Tag Archive: family


Spring Has Sprung

My sadly neglected blog…

I’m back…

But I don’t know how long I can stay…

I am busy about my house…

Spring Cleaning, Spring Planting, Sewing, back at the ranch volunteering and riding,Summer School projects, including Flat Travelers,

I find when I am truly engaged in all that my family needs, I have little time for my blog.

But I have tales to tell, and how I miss telling them here…

In-Law-meter

My in-law-meter has been reaching dangerous levels, and I fear this time it may not return to resting on empty, but rather reside at a level of not only increased awareness, but a level that neccessitates cutting off all access so as not to top off and blow a fuse for good!

Let me explain, because you are probably wondering what the helk an in-law-meter is…

In my case, it functions very similarly to the spedometer in my car.  Which my Fruit Loops call the speed-o-meter. 

 The speed-o-meter registers the speed at which my car is traveling. 

Now we all know that the speed-o-meter will register speeds at which legally my car should never travel.  That is because the speed limit , tells me how fast I can travel.  Now keep in mind that under the law, these speed limits have been invoked, and I am obligated, by law, to abide by the speed limits.  I am not required to like the Speed Limit.  I am simply required to respect the speed limit, despite the highly visible temptation, right there on my dash, in lights on the speed-o-meter, to break the Speed Limit. 

It is important to note, that speed limits vary, typically increasing the further you get from your home.  For instance, the speed limit in my neighborhood is 25mph.  As I continue down the road, it increases to 45mph, and then reaching the parkway, I can travel at 60mph (I think, I do anyway).  Finally, if I were to get onto the interstate I would likely be permitted to travel 70 and in some cases 75 mph.  So the further I get from home, the higher the needle on my Speed-o-meter.

My in-law-meter, registers just the same.  In my own little neck of the woods, the needle on my in-law-meter rests comfortable at empty!  In relation to the in-laws who live locally, we have settled into a safe speed of ignoring eachother (because we like it better that way, or because we take eachother for granted).  Either way, the arrangement keeps the in-law-meter at a reasonable, manageable reading. 

Then there are the distant in-laws.  They travel across country just to see you. They stay in your home, they eat your food, use your towels, sleep at hours when your family doesn’t sleep, requiring you (out of hospitable obligation) to keep four Fruit Loops quiet, at hours of the day when they are otherwise busy about the house.  All of that still keeps the reading at safe numbers. 

But then, just when you think you can keep control, the distant in-law requests a family get together.

Now, you have to invite them all (the local in-laws), to your home, the ones you have chosen to ignore, and the ones you have taken for granted, all gathered together, observing not only how you interact with them individually, but comparing it to how you treat the others. 

In an event like this, you are now trying to juggle being the perfect wife, smiling and laughing at the stories your Dear Husband repeats to all the family members who were not only present when the story actually happened, but have heard the recap at every family gathering since;

 while being the perfect mother, speaking so softly to the children, while directing them as to what needs to be done to keep the guests happy, and greeting their unwillingness to comply with entertaining a bunch of adults when all they want to do is retreat to their room to play video games, with a smile and a hug so that you can whisper in their ear “do it, or I sell the video game”;

while being a waitress, serving soft drinks coffee, tea, and just one everyone has a beverage in hand the first one served is ready for a refill,

while engaging in interesting conversation, about news worthy topics, but never politics, even though we are in the middle of a historic election, with impending results that could  upset the flow of the congressional universe,

while watching the football game, and cheering for the appropriate team, because if you don’t then your guests cry, ‘oh but you don’t even get to watch the game, you poor dear’ blaming it in their minds on the demands of having a husband and four Fruit loops rather than properly placing blame on their presence, their demands, and their overall distaste for you which causes you to be walking on egg shells (or something more like broken glass in my case) in your own home.

This my friends, is when the IN-LAW-METER, reaches heights that the manufacturers never anticipated. 

And just when you think you can’t maintain control for another moment, someone elses in-law-meter tops off, and the argument begins!

There is screaming, and yelling; accusations and expletives; in the midst of it all you suddenly hear your own voice and that is when you realize, ‘my in-law-meter has topped off too’

Alas, the end is near, one in-law has been running so fast and so far from social graces, she is out of gas, and out the door!

For a moment, my in-law-meter rests below the line!

But I shall not get too comfortable, there remains my houseguest, who attempts to live in the neutral zone (where long distance in-laws have the privelage of residing), and thinks that in the aftermath, perhpas she can smooth out all the ruffled feathers and restore peace, as she imagined it, before she arrived.

Little does she know, that this peace, where the in-law-meter rests comfortable below empty, can only be achieved and maintained by keeping the proper distance and silence among local in-laws.

It’s true, after her departure, the laws that govern my own personal in-law relations will resume, and then my in-law-meter will rest, undisturbed, until the next distant relative gets a new model of the  in-law-meter and decides to take it out for a test drive and see what this baby can do!

Lovin’ Life

 I love that my husband *brews coffee (he doesn’t even drink it) and brings a cup to my room every morning, so that I can have a little ME time before the day is in full swing.

*For any one thinking I should be the one brewing the coffee for him, it is biblical that he takes on this task. There is a whole book about in the bible, you may be familiar, it is call HeBrews!

I love that when my Fruit Loops wake up, they come in one by one to announce they have awakened, and then slip quietly back out of the room! 

I love that when I sing

Goodmorning Puzzler
Goodmorning Puzzler
Goodmorning Puzzler
This is your morning Song!

Puzzler covers his ears as if he doesn’t want to hear me sing, but smiles from ear to ear while I sing!

I love that Whistler, greets Tiny Dancer with a hug and a smile and scoop her up to go find a bottle of milk and watch Sesame Street Silly Songs!

I love that Tiny Dancer loves her Sesame Street Silly Songs DVD as much as Racer loved his Sesame Street Silly Songs VHS!  And that while she is watching intently, he can still sing along!

I love that my when I walk into my living room, there is a wall full of windows, letting me greet the day with sunshine and pine trees, squirrels scurrying about, and deer eating whatever deer find to eat as they graze across our property!

I love that my house can be a bit messy, and no body but me cares!

I love that when we skip school to play Monopoly, my husband, the principal, is okay with it, because he values our family relationships as much as education.

I love that my cats run up and down the hall, playing chase with our new kitten!  Those old lazy cats have come back to life again,and it reminds me that we are only as old as we think we are!

I love that my friends will go on tangents with me, like soapmaking, and quilting!  And we can laugh together about the very notion that we would have time to take on such lofty endeavors! And yet somehow, because we are doing it together, we do find time!

I love that His Mercies are new everymorning…

A clean slate for the day,

Renewed Energy,

Rested Hearts and Minds,

Peace before the Chaos of the Day.

Take Every Thought Captive. (2 Corinthians 10:5)

A simple instruction. 

Which brings up two questions,

 How do I catch ‘every thought’?

and where do I put ‘every thought’ to keep him captive?

Well let’s consider brain’s train of thought. 

Before this train starts moving you better get a good conductor.

 

Don’t choose that guy, I’m guessing he does’t know much more than we do.

Preferably you choose the Lord, because you are probably not qualified. ( And even if you happen to be reading this and you are a train conductor, this is an analogy so go with it. )

If you haven’t chosen a conductor, or if you are walking in pride, believing you can do it yourself, then your thoughts are a train wreck waiting to happen.

Well this morning, I am working with The Conductor, to get my train of thought back on track.

The Conductor and I have been moving in the right direction, but with a few operating malfunctions, and I would like to get those ironed out, so the ride will be a bit smoother. Then maybe The Conductor and I can sit back and relax, and watch the Steelers win their first game of the season.

So here I go to begin working to take my thoughts captive, so that these bandits (train robbers) don’t steal my Joy!

Perhaps you would like to take a train trip with me…

We will board at  Psalm 51:12

Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit.

Then we will take a jaunt to Romans 15:3

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.

Now Traveling with the companionship of the Holy Spirit, lets stop off at Galatians 5:22-23

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.

OOops we have encountered a problem on the track and must revert to James 1:2-4

Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds,  for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

While we wait, if you look to the west, you can get a glimpse of Proverbs 10:28

The hope of the righteous brings joy, but the expectation of the wicked will perish.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Problem solved, so now we can stop off at Phillipians 2:1-2

So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy,  complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind.

And then we arrive at our final destination Proverbs 31:28

Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her:

I’m Sorry, SOOOOOOO Sorry

What is it with this phrase?

Why don’t people like to say “I’m Sorry”?

Let’s begin our chat, by defining – Sorry:

Sorry – 1. Grieved for the loss of some good; pained for some evil that has happened to one’s self or friends or country. It does not ordinarily imply severe grief, but rather slight or transient regret. It may be however, and often is used to express deep grief. We are sorry to lose the company of those we love; we are sorry to lose friends or property; we are sorry for the misfortunes of our friends or of out country. And the king was sorry. Matt 14. (Webster’s 1828 )

I heard a story recently in which a parent, entrusted her children to another parent.  The parent providing the child care, allowed her children, and those of her friend to play outside.  Reasonable.

But one of the Caregivers children, made a grave error in judgement, and one of the children in her care got hurt.  The injuries turned out to be superficial, but truly the result could have been as serious as paralysis or death. 

The Caregiver, refused to apologize to the parent of the injured child.  On the grounds that there was no real biblical offense. 

WOW!

I was so shocked by this it caused me to seek out some answers from the Lord about taking responsibility, asking for forgiveness, saying I’m Sorry.

First and simplest, any time a child gets hurt at my home or in my care I am Sorry! 

Second, saying I’m Sorry is not always taking responsibility.  Certainly, in the example I gave here, the Caregiver is responsible, and should be sorry and ask forgiveness.

But it is possible to be Sorry and not be at fault. 

I’m sorry people die of cancer, but I am not responsible for cancer.

Which brings me to my third and probably most important observation:

Is there ever a time, when someone is hurt or offended that we should refrain from being sorry?

I wil try to clarify my thinking:

When someone is injured – I am sorry they are hurt.

I don’t have to evaluate who’s at fault to know that I am sorry they are in pain.

When someone is offended by me, I am sorry. 

It is not my desire to be offensive.  But that does not always mean my behavior or opinion or action is wrong.

So if someone were to come to me, and say ” I am offended”

I could automatically respond, “I’m sorry your offended”

It isn’t my job to evaluate whether or not they should be offended, they are already telling me they are offended.  It is now my job to ask the Lord to examine my heart, and show me if I have sinned. 

Once I go before the Lord, I may need to go beyond “I’m sorry” and take responsibility and ask for forgiveness.

My conclusion is that it is always okay to be ‘sorry’ when someone is hurt or offended. 

That is if it is not your desire for people to be in pain physically, emotionally or psychologically.